Everyone had their eyes on her. Maybe it was because everyone was already expecting her to come. Still it was a huge deal for a new kid in a school like this in a town like this. She came in hardly making eye contact with anyone for the teacher in front was clearly annoyed by someone disrupting his class but then it was none of her fault. However I didn’t bring my eyes to her for I already knew of her and all her causalities or so I thought.
It was just a scorching hot day no different than any other here but almost everyone in my class was already talking about the new kid. After the girl settled in at the back of the class some distant whisper of introducing could be heard. Being directly in front of the teacher I chose to ignore it and focused on what actually mattered and at that point I was sure as hell it wasn’t about some new kid. As usual all the fuss subsided and it was like she didn’t even exist.
That was what I thought until the teacher left and what a lucky day the teacher after was absent leaving us to be alone. That was when things just literally went wild. It was like ants finding a pot full of sugary sweetness. All were around her bombarding her with the same old questions which I’m sure they’ll forget the answers in minutes. I was just going on with my normal routine chatting on lifelessly with my long lost childhood friend whom now is also my deskmate.
“Why don’t you go talk to her.”
I asked myself why wouldn’t I. There’s nothing wrong now I’m sure but what if I seem too interested like every other soul in this class. But still a part of me wanted to know what was she like. Is she even anything close to what have I been told. What if it was all just some normal high school gossip that people usually spread. But I’ve known her for years why would she tell me lies about a kid I hardly knew.
Pushing every single thought people have infused my brain with, I headed to the back of the little bit too tiny classroom that occupied 30 of us. Casually I leaned on her table attempting to start a small talk. My mind was giving me warning signals to retreat but it was like my feet were glued. Red signals that clearly said it was a bad idea but that’s the thing about me I don’t use what my brain orders me to do.
Being the lame kid that I was I told her about homework out of all the things normal people could start a conversation with I chose to be a nerd telling her about things that didn’t matter and I for one don’t even finish them. Realising it was a wrong move I chose to restart with something more normal but I think I might have come out as a creepy stalker asking about her whole history. Then again she’s just agreeing to whatever I say without actually using words. I didn’t even introduce myself. God what was I thinking. This explains her confused look. But she was just too polite to tell me out. Now my mind was divided by who she really is and what I was told. I shouldn’t have been foolish to actually believe people. Now actually giving it a shot I attempted to get to know her but before things could go any further the teacher came in diminishing all my intentions.
Giving her a small smile I left her. She actually did smile back. It seemed like nothing but gosh she’s cute when she smiles showing off her slightly crooked teeth. If only then I knew I would be this attached to someone I didn’t even have an intention to be more than just classmates. Things change I guess and we can’t change fate. I wouldn’t say that I regret destiny brought me to the back of the class when she was still busily fidgeting with her books and arranging her stuff to get organized and she really loves doing that. If she only knew how much I would give up just to relive this day. She was just there mindlessly yet playfully playing with the strings at her purple file that was far too big for her tiny hands and her edgy fingernails indicating that she bites her nails. She didn’t need to know how imperfectly perfect she was but I saw it there and then back when I saw her.
Within months we were closer than ever and honestly I keep wondering till today how was that even possible. Was that all just a dream? She was calling me her darling before you know it. People was starting to get jealous over us and being the identical fit of each other we had to make it more obvious as we found joy in that. Fights make a relationship stronger as she’ll always tell me and I can’t tell you enough of how many of those I have had. It could last me a few life times. We bickered around for almost the smallest of the smallest things. And every time that happened I’ll keep worrying that this is it she’s going to leave me for real this time yet she proves me wrong. She makes me feel special even through arguments cause she ain’t the type that cares of what others think of her and us fighting makes me feel different from others in her eyes. There is literally nothing that I can’t love about her from the way she ties her hair to how peaceful her face looks when she’s asleep.
She doesn’t know how much she means to me till today. But I can say this that when both of us had our first conversation back there neither of us thought that we’ll complete each other in almost every way. All my favourite conversations are all with her and she wouldn’t even know it. I might be her one but she’s my only one. I found home in her arms and I knew what it was to be loved. All this long it was just me thinking of when I should leave permanently. She became a reason for me to keep moving forward and never give up. She doesn’t know how much she’s help make my life much better I just wish that I can repay her but what she’s done for me can never be repaid. I would never change the new kid entering my class on that day with that ridiculous timid smile on her face for anything in the world. I would choose to relive the awkwardness on any other day as long as she stays. The world is finally turning around for the better. This is my story where it all began.